Welcome… I’m off!

I often envy caterpillars that have their own on-site cocoon. When I come out of my cocoon I’m no butterfly but pretty much the same as when I went in. And then people say, “Your rest doesn’t seem to have done you much good.” Take a recent example. My cocoon and refuge of which I …

A long run to Victor

Sumer is icumen in, more sophisticated than ever. Air-conditioners hum to cricket viewing in colour. The neighbour contemplates his trailerboat cruiser, towering its fibreglass majesty (two outboards and echo sounder) above your grovelling hedge. Upon the leisurely Murray, many-bunked houseboats bear friends getting away from it all as comfortably as possible. Caravans raise their collapsible …

Wrapping rite worries

People who say I am wrapped in festive season may well be right. For now comes my yearly testing time, the simple yet, to me, infinitely difficult and almost hopeless task of wrapping presents. People know when they receive my presents. They know by the wrinkled paper and the ugly turned edges with the make-do …

Unacustard as I am…

A man in France is seeking a world record by staying in a tub of tomato sauce, for 72 hours. He has previously bathed in mayonnaise. You can bet your life there’ll be someone peering through the key hole to watch the French dressing. Dismiss me with a snort if you will but some people …